Emotions are high

So this has been quite a year.  Last year at this time, I was just given a job offer (of what would be my third job in 2013).  On August 7, I would walk out of the job I had over the summer, after my kitten dying and my transmission on my car failing.  I was about 6 months into my relationship.

This February, my Quigley passed, my first furbaby.  In June my mom died.  And on July 25, I got engaged.  What a roller coaster!  So my head is basically spinning at this point.  I'm SO excited about my upcoming wedding, and I'm so sad that my mom didn't live to see it, since she absolutely adored my fiance.  I feel poor, so the prospect of a wedding next year is even more daunting.  And here I am thinking, "shit, I better get this weight off already."

I still wish I could figure out what happened to me, to gain back 90lb.  I don't have a clue.  I know I had issues with the sciatica so my mobility was impaired for a while.  I also had walking pnemonia all last spring, and the year before that a sinus infection.  But, it's 90lb.  That's a lot to just gain back.  And that makes me wonder if I can succeed in losing it again.  When I started my weight loss journey, that wasn't my goal.  I was just trying to cope with life, and exercise was my answer.

At any rate, Curtis is starting up at the gym again today so I have to keep up!  He lost weight like it was easy last time, so I need to get my butt in gear and focus.  I'm counting calories, but more than that, trying to be conscious of what I put in my mouth.  And the alcohol has got to go.  Special occasions excepted.

Wish me luck!